The beam was never really my event. But someday I’ll be a contender.

I am clearly a competitive person.

If I decide to do something, I am in it to win it.

I am also goal oriented.

Nothing motivates me like a deadline or a finish line.

I also have a tendency to be an all or nothing person.

Give me a bag of potato chips and I will either eat none of it, or all of it.

Put me in a weight loss competition, and I won’t lose some weight.

I will lose all the weight.

Sometimes this competitive, all-or-nothing mindset is good.

But I’m learning that sometimes it’s not.

I have an issue with patience.

I want pretty much everything to happen yesterday.

When I have an idea, I feel the need to act on it immediately.

And I want to see results  just as quickly.

I am learning that going psycho for a short period of time may give me instant results.

But they are often short lived.

That’s why I had a meltdown a couple months ago.

I went into overdrive.

I wasn’t sleeping.

For a short time, I got a lot of shit done.

But then I crashed.

And ultimately rendered myself useless.

My strategy kind of backfired on me.

Now I don’t think I’m ever going to totally be the tortoise.

But I need to up my percentage of slow and steady a little bit.

And I need to accept reality.

There are only so many hours in a day.

And sometimes things just don’t work out the way that you had envisioned them ideally.

I continue to throw these grown up tantrums, or live in denial in response to things not working out the way I thought they would. Or should.

Rather than accept reality.

Sometimes our initial reaction is to throw in the towel and quit, rather than to reevaluate and adjust.

Back in January I registered for a half iron man triathlon in June.

Up until about 4 weeks ago, I was doing really well with the training.

And then I got sick.

Sicker than I’ve ever been.

It really messed my body up.

I missed the half marathon I was supposed to run in the beginning of April.

4 weeks later, I’m still not totally right.

I ran with a friend this weekend, and I could barely run 4 miles.

I went to my usual tabata class for the first time since I got sick this past Monday, and I couldn’t even do all the reps of all the sets.

That has never happened to me.

I lost a lot of strength when I was sick. Like, a lot.

I’m still kind of weak.

Historically, I have not been good at  listening to my body.

I will push, and push, and push. No matter what.

But  my body is trying to tell me something.

It’s not ready.

It won’t be ready in June.

I have gone back and forth on this hundreds of times.

I need to listen to my body.

So I am going  to withdraw from the triathlon.

I’m not quitting.

I’m just adjusting.

I will still do that triathlon.

Just not when I thought I originally would.

Balance.

I am just getting a hold on this balance thing.

It has taken me a long time to get here.

And I’m still only a beginner in the balance department.

I know I will fall off the beam many, many more times.

But I am finally learning to make gradual changes that are not only manageable, but sustainable.

I think maybe that’s what is hard for a lot of us.

Slow and steady can be frustrating.

But I think that needs to be a part of the plan.

My next e-course starts in 4 days.

I’ll be honest,.

A year ago, I was basically pushing participants to work out.

A lot.

I’m realizing that that’s not for everyone.

Don’t get me wrong.

You need to work out in some capacity if you want to be healthy.

There is no way around that.

But just as I am evolving, so is my e-course.

It’s more about being healthy and confident, and less about solely focusing on losing weight.

It’s about finding balance, structure, and a higher level of fitness.

For this next course, I have two goals.

The first is for each participant to incorporate some form of exercise into his or her daily routine.

That’s not just for your body. It’s for your brain, too.

Of course I will encourage you to push yourself out of your comfort zone.

Because that is where personal growth occurs.

The second will be for everyone to set one goal, and make one healthy change to achieve that goal.

Maybe you want to lose (more) weight.

Maybe you aren’t getting enough sleep.

Maybe you need to increase strength or flexibility.

Maybe your diet sucks.

By making one manageable, sustainable change, you will move yourself closer to that goal.

And become a little bit healthier in the process.

Maybe you commit to getting up 10 minutes earlier. Or drinking two glasses of water a day. Or turning off the t.v. at a certain time each night. Or finding a good therapist. Or adding a serving of vegetables to one meal each day.

You know what behaviors are holding you back from living your best, healthiest, happiest life.

Me?

I have a pretty big list.

I do not have a regular date night with  my husband.

I still fall asleep in front of the television every night.

I don’t read as much as I used to.

I put too much sugar in my coffee.

I check my phone way too often.

I don’t always drink as much water as I need to.

Now all of those things are holding me back from living my healthiest, happiest life in some way.

Rather than try to tackle them all at once, go guns blazing, and then crash and burn about 4 days in, I’m going to,

as my dad would say,

pick away at the list.

Who wants to pick away with me?

Register here.

Balance is only 4 days away.

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