Because Little Girls Should Dress Like Little Girls

I lean pretty far to the left when it comes to politics.

And every one knows with regard to curse words, I use those fuckers liberally.

But there are some areas where I guess you’d call me conservative.

And one of those areas is the clothing my daughters wear.

I believe little girls should dress like, um… little girls.

And I believe pre-teen girls should dress like pre-teen girls. Not like 24 year-olds.

Since we are coming out of a really bad financial situation, I have not bought new clothes for any of the kids for a few years. (Except for things I see at Costco, like pajamas, and you know, the robes).

Plus, I am not a shopper. I hate shopping.

But we have our swim team banquet in a couple days, and Number 5 and Number 7 really didn’t have any dresses to wear that fit them, so I told them I’d take them to Kohl’s to get a new dress. I had some Kohl’s cash to use, so it wouldn’t really cost me anything.

So we went to  Kohl’s yesterday. Number 4 came along for the girl time. Since I never ever take the girls shopping, this was a big deal.

Number 7 acted as if she’d never set foot outside of our house before.

Number 5 has just moved up from the little girl section of Kohl’s to the regular girl section.

She and Number 4 ran to check the dresses there out while I took Number 7 to look at the ones in her size.

I found some great dresses for Number 7. Some appropriate, modest, super cute dresses.

After we had picked out a bunch, we found Number 4 and 5. They had an armful of dresses.

An armful of cheesy, crappy, and borderline slutty dresses.

In a size 7/8.

What. The Fuck.

I vetoed almost all of their choices.

25% of them were inappropriate. 50% were super cheesy.  And 20% were just plain ugly.

Half the stuff she picked out looked like something Tess from Working Girl would have worn.

Why do girls’ dresses and clothing in general need to be so goddamn grown up?

I know little girls like that. I know they like to put on their mom’s high heel shoes and dresses and they dream about the day they can wear that kind of stuff.

But let them dream! Let them wait! Let them wear fucking kids’ clothes, for chrissake.

Who is designing this shit?

It’s terrible!

I sent Number 4 and 5 back to the drawing board about three times.  Each time, Number 5 became more and more upset.

“MOM! Everything I like, YOU HATE!”

She was right. I hated almost every single cheesy thing.

I went with them and searched. And searched. And searched. I found a few things that were cute.

And Number 5 hated all of my choices.

“MOM! Everything you like, I HATE!”

We finally found something adorable and appropriate. But it was amidst a whole bunch of horrible garbage. And Number 5 was really, REALLY distracted by the garbage.

And by the time we found it, I was a sweaty and out of breath and ready to gouge my own eyeballs out.

So while the deals at Kohl’s are pretty good, the selection is horrendous. At least for eight-year-old girls.

If I didn’t hate shopping before, I sure as shit hated it after taking three girls who are ten and under dress shopping there.

Sure, there are some good deals at Kohl’s. But I think the next time we spring for something new, I’m just gonna bite the bullet and go to Janie and Jack.

That shit’s expensive.

But I think keeping my daughters’ dignity intact is worth a few extra bucks.


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