Being divorced and living on my own is a strange feeling.
It’s starting to feel “normal.”
But it’s still a little weird.
It’s weird to have an absence of tension in my house.
It’s weird to have peace.
It’s weird to have freedom.
But it’s still a little weird.
What’s also weird is being 100% responsible for everything myself.
I’m very fortunate to have both my parents around and a really big support network of friends.
If I ever had an emergency or just needed help with something, I have a ton of people I could turn to.
But up until about 3 weeks ago, I was living with my ex-husband until I closed on my new place.
While we didn’t really interact with each other, if there was something that needed to be done that he would normally have taken care of, I would let him know.
Now that I’m on my own, I’m the only adult here.
It can be easy to fall into roles in a marriage where you expect your spouse to do certain things.
And if he/she doesn’t do them, you wait. You remind. You nag.
You complain to your spouse about not taking action and you complain to your friends about your spouse not taking action.
For the past three weeks, I’ve had a big leather couch in my garage.
It’s pretty heavy.
I got it from a friend and I had a spot picked out for it, but getting it in the front door was going to be a challenge.
Then getting down a set of stairs, around a landing and then down another set of stairs was going to be very much NOT FUN.
And this stupid couch has been hanging over my head for a while and I just wanted to get it inside so I can be done with the heavy lifting once and for all.
My parents have helped enough. They have reached their heavy-furniture-lifting limit.
So today I decided I was gonna get that couch inside myself.
Well, with the help of the kids.
If I could get the couch around the back of the house, I could take it inside through a sliding glass door and there would be no stairs to navigate.
We still have a decent amount of snow, and carrying it down a hill was going to be next to impossible.
So, I came up with an idea.
We put the couch on two sleds.
My son did not believe.
“MOM. THIS IS NEVER GOING TO WORK. THIS IS SO STUPID.”
Then we slid that fucker down the hill. 😄
I SHOWED HIM.
But then we got to the sliding door and it was way too small to get the couch through.
THANK GOD FOR GOOGLE.
I typed in “how do you get sliding glass doors off the track?”
A couple minutes and a couple screws later, the doors were out.
They would have been too heavy for me to pick up myself, but with the help of the 15-year-old, we got them out.
And we got the couch in.
And then we re-installed the doors.
It took me a minute to figure that out, but my son and I got it done together.
I am really proud of myself.
And I just wanted to remind you that YOU are capable of anything and everything.
Sometimes it takes a little teamwork.
Sometimes it takes a little thinking outside the box.
Sometimes it requires you to take a risk.
But whatever it takes, whatever it requires, you can handle it.
I know, because I handled it today.
And my kids saw me.
My son doubted me.
Now he believes a little bit more in me.
My girls saw their mom do hard shit.
They were reminded that they can do hard shit.
Knowing I figured out how to do something I would have normally waited for someone else to do feels good.
But showing my kids that a woman can take care of anything she wants to?
Well, to be honest… nothing really compares to that.