Smahtuh than he looks.

There is a street in my town that only people who live here know how to pronounce.

A street that, when said over the phone, is pretty much never spelled correctly by someone who hasn’t driven down that road.

It’s ten letters long, and if you’ve never heard anyone say it, you wouldn’t know how to read it correctly if you saw it on a street sign.

I’m not sure any of the kids know how to spell it.

And that street name, along with a combination of numbers, is my iTunes password.

At least it was.

We have always marveled at how smart Number 4 is.

We think she has a photographic memory.

She can listen to a song once and pretty much memorize it.

She can watch a TV show one time and repeat pretty much all the dialogue verbatim.

But even she couldn’t spell this street name.

Or maybe she could.

Yesterday I was notified of a couple charges to my iTunes account.

More than a couple, actually.

But who knew the password?

It had to be Number 4. Only she’d be able to spell my password.

How she had figured it out was a whole other issue.

I confronted her.

“What did you buy from iTunes?”

“Nothing,” she answered.

I could tell she was telling the truth because she looked right at me, and when she lies she looks up and to the left.

I asked her one more time.

She looked me right in the eyes again.

“MOM-UH! I DIDN’T BUY ANYTHING!!!”

She was telling the truth.

Huh.

Had I bought something? Had I completely blanked?

No. It was someone else.

But who the hell was it?

Who could have known my password and then spelled it correctly?

Number 6 is the one who plays games on the iPad.

But he’s only 4.

He still pees in a pull up every night and yells for me to WIPE MY BOTTOM! every time he takes a poop.

It couldn’t have been him.

But I asked him anyway. If he knew anything, he’d at least inadvertently tell on the culprit.

“Number 6, did you buy something on my iPad?”

“Yes!” he said.

Wait. What?

“What did you buy?” I asked him.

“I bought some Cwossy Woad chawactews,” he told me.

Proudly.

“How did you buy them?” I asked him.

“I know yowah passwohd” he said. “I can spell it! W-H-I-S-C-O-N-I-E-AW…”

For good measure, he spelled it again.

And again.

And then, he showed me the characters he bought.

All $46 worth of them.

I think we have a sleeper in the house.

Number 4’s got some competition.

 

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