Sometimes when you are feeling really blue, you have to fake it.
You have to pretend for the kids or your coworkers or your students or whoever that everything is great.
It takes a lot of effort and a lot of focus and a lot of energy and it’s exhausting.
Today I had one of those days.
A day where my mind kept wandering in a direction I didn’t want it to go, and a day where I had to spend massive amounts of energy to redirect it.
To act.
To pretend.
And now I honestly just can’t think.
Does anyone else have those days?
Or is it just me?
On days like this when I have to spend every minute pretending that everything is great, my brain ends up being useless.
Which is where I am right now.
All my brain power was depleted today pretending like everything is great.
It’s not.
And I’m not looking for sympathy or help. And I don’t think I’m different than anyone else.
But today has been one of those days where what was on the outside was not a true reflection of what was on the inside.
And I’m really tired.
Please keep voting!
You have put my life into words.
One day at a time. Hoping tomorrow is better for you.
Go to bed! Tomorrow is a new day!
I have those days many times a week. It’s exhausting. On the other hand you have us and we are here for you just as you have been here for us. Deal with your shit and let’s get going. ❤️❤️. (All meant in love you are truly a great person; whom I’ve never met, but I love you regardless)
Yes! To get lost while chasing the reflection I want seen!! It is a relief to see it put in words. You are tired though and I hope can get a rest. However you may be feeling, tired or fatigued or even moody and grumpy ( I am) , it shows in how you put together your words and how you space them! That is ” feeling onomatopoeia” and I love that literary quality in your writing!!???? What I read above , says how tired. A yawn in the space of two words. A definitive loud press of ‘enter’! Your words are real and a most true reflection of thought! Love that so much
❤❤
You are certainly not the only one that has days like that. I find all the energy goes into mood control that I have nothing left to do other things which tends to compound the issue because then I feel like I have not accomplished the things I had planned on. It can be a vicious cycle but usually it passes in a day or two. Hopefully yours has passed already. 🙂
I spent years having those days. I was pretty good at it. Then one day my 5th grader made me a pin with a little smiley face for me. This is where I stopped in my tracks. I wasn’t fooling everyone, just my oblivious husband. After some psychotherapy, and prozac I came out on the other side. Still a day will come where I have to smile pretty and remind myself… this too shall pass.
Yes!! More often than not. “All that I feel is the realness I’m faking” OAR -Shattered.
I’m always telling my kids, ” it’s fine if you’re grumpy. Just be grumpy for a while and then you’ll probably feel better.” It’s hard to follow this advice as a parent. There’s so much pressure to be calm and happy and in total control of your emotions all the time. But it’s totally fine to feel crappy sometimes. For no reason. Sorry you’re having a crappy day. I had one last week. Maybe tomorrow will be better. I hope it is.
It’s tough. But on the other hand, can you treat the time when you are ‘faking it for your kids’ as a little vacation from your difficult mental space to another mental space that is also part of who you are? It’s not pretending – it’s just another part of your reality. You can simultaneously be super mom and crestfallen, or even slip between the two identities.
I just wonder if seeing it differently might make you feel less exhausted about doing what you need to do.
So so sorry you’re having such a rough ride. Xx