I had such high hopes for this summer.
I had so many things I wanted to do.
And now, here we are, less than three weeks from the first day of school, and I dropped the ball.
Almost a whole summer has gone by, and I haven’t really enjoyed any of it.
Our financial situation has had a little bit to do with that.
So has my husband’s surgery.
I have worked every single day this summer.
I haven’t slept in once.
I haven’t spontaneously done anything with the kids.
I have worked. And worked. And worked.
We haven’t had any fun.
Well, the kids have.
But as a family, we really haven’t.
My husband and I haven’t spent a single moment alone together.
I have been stressed out and short tempered and feeling as though I need to make use of every single spare second to work.
But the reality of the situation is if I take an afternoon, or a morning,
a whole day off,
That will not destroy us.
But not taking a couple moments, or hours, or maybe even days to slow down,
well that just might destroy me.
If we are going to lose our house, we are going to lose our house.
I’m hoping that we can find a way to avoid that.
But I can’t do that if I work myself into oblivion.
And I probably would be a lot more efficient if I gave myself a little time to recharge.
So in these next remaining two and a half weeks of summer vacation, that’s what I’m going to do.
I’m still going to work my ass off.
But I’m also going to have fun.
And I’m going to give my kids some memories.
I had a summer bucket list in my head at the start of summer.
I kind of mentally crumpled that thing up.
I’ve uncrumpled it, smoothed it out, and revisited it.
I’m printing this out, not to put more pressure on myself, but as a reminder.
I spent all winter waiting for summer to finally arrive.
It’s not too late to enjoy it.
Now where did I put those bocce balls?