A couple weeks ago I wrote a birthday guideline post that was applauded by many but that also had thousands of people ripping me a new a-hole.
Because I guess wasting thousands of dollars on a party for a one-year-old makes sense to a lot of people.
And apparently lots of people don’t read very carefully, because according to them, I wrote that you should not celebrate your child’s birthday or have any kind of party whatsoever.
I never said that.
I just suggested that maybe you don’t be an idiot and go overboard.
Today I had a very small party at my house for Number 5 and 6.
I let Number 5, who turned six years old invite six friends over.
Five of them came to her party.
Number 6, who turned five years old, invited two friends over.
Why only two friends?
Because those are the only two kids he wanted to invite over.
Number 4, who is eight years old, wanted to plan the party.
So I let her.
I gave her $15 to spend at the dollar store.
And then I let her take care of the rest.
And by the rest, I mean all of it.
As luck would have it, I went to a pasta dinner for the swim team on Wednesday where there was a ton of leftover food.
Including a big ass sheet cake from Costco.
It never got opened. So I asked if I could have it if no one wanted it.
And no one did.
So I got a cake for free.
It said “Good Luck Makos” on it, but nobody cared.
Number 4 took her $15 to the Dollar Store and picked out tablecloths, plates, napkins, balloons, streamers, and necklaces and bracelets.
She was allowed to invite three friends over to help her.
They set the table,
blew up balloons,
and hung them up along with the streamers.
The mom of one of Number 5’s friends sent me a text a couple days ago.
Hypothetically, if someone were to order pizzas and have them delivered to your house, what would the address be?
Hypothetically.
I gave her my hypothetical address and graciously accepted her offer.
That same mom told me that she knew how to make balloon animals and asked if I’d like her to make some at the party.
Um…
Yeah.
Those were a hit. Especially with Number 7.
I told Number 4 the hypothetical pizzas would be delivered at noon, and she signed for them.
She and her party planning assistants handed out the pizza.
Then they got the well-wishing good luck/birthday cake ready and cut it themselves after singing Happy Birthday.
Number 5 and 6 were just fine with it.
So was Number 7 after receiving the world’s biggest piece of cake ever.
Then they gave mani/pedis to the guests.
They brought the party inside for the gift opening.
And then before it was time for the party to end, they took all the balloons down from the deck and did relay/balloon popping races with them.
$15.
A good time was had by all, and I will not have to rent out Disney World next year to top this party.
So there.
Vivienne says
Funny. So you threw a $15 party by getting other people to pay for it. Which makes me giggle as there is no way I’d be blogging about it if I could get myself to accept the charity.
Margaret says
Friends helping friends, especially one with seven children is not charity, it’s friendship. The real kind, that you don’t need to buy with expensive parties.
Anna says
So, hold on a minute. What are you attacking here?
Or better yet, what are you defending?
Would the sheet cake have been better off in the garbage?
Should she have spurned the offer for pizza?
Are people who accept charity less worthwhile (though I would argue this wasn’t charity at all, but frugality)?
I mean obviously this hit a nerve for you because you had to take the time to leave a comment, but it’s really unclear what you’re even taking issue with.
Or maybe you don’t have a real standpoint at all and you’re just being nasty for fun. In which case, don’t bother next time.
Steph says
Amen.
Vanessa says
Vivienne,
I’m truly sorry that you live such a miserable life. I’m truly sorry that you have so little joy that you must spend your time negatively judging other mothers. I truly hope you can find happiness and become and supportive part of the human race.
Tracy says
You obviously are not a regular reader of this blog and therefore have no idea what Susie does for others. jealous perhaps?
Karin says
You know what the bible says, ” don’t be s judgemental cuntbag. “
Koo says
My favorite Bible verse!
Kb says
Obviously someone’s mother never taught them that if they didn’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it all.
Deanna says
“getting other people to pay for it”
In order for that to have happened, she would have had to call up the parent and asked for her to buy the pizzas. She would have had to gotten with the swim meet dinner people and asked them to buy a cake and not open it and then asked someone for the $15 for #4 to get supplies.
That’s not exactly what I read.
What I read was that she saw a cake that someone was going to inevitably have to take home and force on people (because really….a sheet cake is HUGE and there is only so much of it you can eat before you feel like puking just looking at it)
A parent called her up and offered her pizza. That’s not exactly charity.
According to dictionary dot com, charity is defined (in part) as:
1. generous actions or donations to aid the poor, ill, or helpless:
2. something given to a person or persons in need; alms
The pizzas were not sent to aid the poor, ill or helpless. They were not sent to people in need. They were sent for a bunch of kids to eat at a birthday party.
Was that generous? Absolutely! Charity?….not so much.
Go away Vivienne.
————————–
Susie…the kids look like they had a blast.
Anonymous says
Similar to the thoughts I had. So “hypothetically” speaking, if I couldn’t get a free sheet cake or services provided by friends w=coming to the birthday party to sit and chat with the moms while their kids played then I wouldn’t be able to throw a party for $15. I threw an awesome Dinosaur party for two of my kids birthdays (their birthdays are a week apart and their a year apart). I made them paper mache dino eggs which I stuffed $ target gifts inside for their party favors, I made breakfast tacos, dinosaur nuggets, ordered a sheet cake from costco, had table liners and streamers, cut out dino feet from construction paper and placed them on the ground. Pulled up pinterest and made fun dinosaur desserts. I did all of this for just under $100. For two kids and 10 friends over I felt like that was a win!
Deanna says
the majority of your money was spent on target gift cards. So really….if you nixed that (because honestly…why should I get you a gift for coming to a party? I send thank you notes —or rather my kids do— Party Favors have become the new “thank you” for gracing us with your presence. I stopped giving party favors. Parents thanked me because it gave THEM permission to stop spending the money on them. So really…….if you nixed the eggs….nixed the GC’s….made your own cake…..you could have done it for about $25.
MaryAnne Mullaney says
She didn’t say Target gift cards – she said Target $ (i.e.dollar area) gifts.
Ira says
I wish you friends and family that would at least for once make you feel loved and blessed as I Susie does. Perhaps then you’d be able to understand the real meaning of this post.
Jo says
OMG! You are now my idol!
Cheri says
Why be so rude in the comments on this. 1. Everyone had a great time. 2. Sounds like she had a great friend that wanted to help. 3. She let her kids plan the party & they had a great time doing it. Sounds like a win win to me. We used to throw pretty involved parties and they were so much fun. But 4 kids later we usually do thinks much more simple. Pizza & cake or hot dogs and cake is perfect. Everyone usually just eats and leaves & then I get to clean up a huge mess. It’s worth it to have things smaller.
GingEr says
Vivienne,
She didn’t “get” anybody to pay for it. A friend graciously offered help and she accepted. Looks like a fun time was had by all!!! Happy Birthday little people!
Vanessa says
YOU ARE AMAZING!! As a mother of six kids I go absolutely broke,throwing bday parties….and for what? Kids have fun just being together and singing to the birthday child! First let me say that I love that you have friends that are ‘hypothetically’ wanting to help you out and understand the cost associated with having a large family. Also I think you are a genius for asking for the cake. Your kids will remember the love and good time had by all not what was written on the cake…..I know I don’t remember what was written on any of my childhood bday cakes!! It’s also wonderful that you allowed your older child to plan the party. I can only imagine how good it made her feel to do this, not to mention the life lesson involved here with money management! You are a wonderful mom and I thoroughly enjoy reading your blogs as I can relate so well! Keep up the great work and thank you for being so real and inspiring!
Robbie says
Awesome!!!! Good food, good fun, the kids got to plan it and all on a budget!! Heck yeah!!! People losing their minds spending tons of money on a party a child will never remember baffle me. Good job mom!!! Kudos the the mom who sent pizza!!
jessie says
That sounds like a great party! The kids had a blast and you got save on sanity by keeping it low key! I dont consider the pizza charity, i consider it the gift of friendship. It makes me wonder what you did to secure a great friendship- maybe carpooling, babysitting, being a ready ear…. Whatever it is, you deserve friends like that. I almost never comment but i read your words every night and i find you refreshing, funny, and honest. Dont let the haters get you down.
joanna Norland says
love it that your kid steered the organizing — and that you didn’t get hung up on the fact the sheet cake, which would have been binned, had a different name. Ease up, ladies, on the pizza delivery — it was a lovely gesture, but. If that hadn’t happened, they would have made sandwiches, and the party would have been just as fun.
Donna says
Another great blog and to the point. You have great friends who are very nice! Let the naysayers go because they may not have friends who offer to do nice things. Sounded like a wonderful pool party!! Way to go with your frugality–very smart!!! Be proud of yourself!!!
Kristina says
I’m excited for my son’s 2nd birthday this week, my plan is to take of work and take him to the kids area of the science center. He has never been and knowing him, he is going to love it. I plan to bake a cake while he is napping and my husband, daughter and I will give him a cake that night. So much simpler than I usually do but I a, looking forward to the break from throwing a big party.
Linda says
Even if she had provided the food (you can make pizza and cake), costs would have been minimal. One of the best parties my kids had, we played drop the beanbag and had pillowcase races and the mandatory bubbles (5 yrs). One of the attendees told his mom he wanted to have his party at our house. It seems most kids parties now are actually adult party with a bouncy house to keep the kids busy.
I love that the kids planned the party and picked out the decorations and activities — and number of guests.
jane says
This sounded like an awesome party. What a birthday party should be like, friends enjoyment and celebration. Not a money wasting event! Way to go and thanks for sharing.
Elise says
Did you put $15 in the college fund too?
chelsea jacobs says
This is so precious. You know those memories of getting to do everything on her own totally top the renting out disney world ones.
Jen says
This is a great post. It’s a reminder that you don’t need to spend so much money to have a good time. It’s cool that you got your daughter to plan the party. It helps her with money management and planning skills.
Jane Gordon says
What a great way to show kids what it takes to throw a (successful) party! I’m one of those parents that sits back and sees my friends and family members spend hundreds of dollars on parties for their kids just to throw away a lot of snacks, drinks, etc because they went a little too overboard. This is something that I want to try for my kids next birthday. We usually keep it pretty simple, but this is just too cute and gives the kids a little independence. 😉
Anna says
The picture of #7 and the cake.
Awesome.
Christy says
This is just awesome. Yay for being frugal! Glad everyone had fun! 🙂
Anna says
AWESOME that you had help!! I went into reading this thinking, “cool! Let’s see how she did it”…… Admittedly, I did a little sad face at the end because I wouldn’t be so fortunate. So in reality, the party DIDN’T cost $15. It just cost YOU $15. Way to go!!
Tara says
Kudos to you! I think this is fantastic! Important part is, kids had a blast!!
Diana says
Lol, sucks to be vivienne
Naomi says
My Hero
I have always tried to do cheap parties for my son so i make his parties pot luck and ask each guest to bring a plate of finger food to share with the other guests its great it encourages kids to be involved in the party because they choose what to make to put on the plate i do some extra things too but it cuts my costs down immensely also another time for my sons 2nd birthday we had a picnic at the zoo and the guests just had to bring a picnic for their own families and pay for their own kids to get in to the zoo and i provided the cake it worked really well our family and friends were only too happy to participate it was a great day and kids dont need huge expensive birthday parties most kids will just have fun having other kids over im a solo mum so i cant afford to do expensive birthday parties we dont have alot of junk food at my sons birthday parties and 90%of it is home made