Since we had been out of bread and milk and any kind of fruit for two days, I decided I should finally drag my ass to the store this morning. I hadn’t showered in two days, (not even after a 90 minute run yesterday) but it was already 8:30 and the kids were starving. So I threw […]
Humor
Proposed Universal Room Mom Guidelines For End-Of-Year Gifts
Dear Overachieving Room Moms, I always aspired to be like you. To be organized, send out important emails at least a month in advance, come up with cute and unique gifts for the teachers, and throw a class party unlike any other 3rd grade class party in the history of mankind. Then I was a […]
Why I Don’t Bring My Preschoolers to Birthday Parties
Number 5 and 6 are both in preschool. Number 5 is in a 4’s class, and Number 6 is in a 3’s class. If you have kids this age, you know what that means. Invitations to at least 197 birthday parties throughout the school year. Back when Number 3 was in preschool and I was […]
How do you solve a problem like Number Fooooooo-uuuuuuurrrrrr?
The high school is putting on a production of the Sound of Music this weekend, and Number 3 and 4 are in the children’s ensemble. I have been seriously disorganized in the SOM department. To spare you the boring details and to make a long story short, let’s just say I have been less than […]
Her project looks like sh*t. And I’m totally okay with that.
Yesterday two people posted this picture (from George Takei’s Facebook page) to my Facebook page: The fact that Number 4 had a “personal heritage project” due yesterday made it even funnier. Or should I say “Number 4” had a personal heritage project due yesterday. Because let’s be honest. I bet you can count on one […]
To The Future Girlfriends and Boyfriends of My Sons and Daughters
Dear Future Girlfriends and Boyfriends of My Sons and Daughters, Today is Valentine’s Day. I did not buy Valentine’s Day presents for my kids, your boyfriends and girlfriends, today. I did not give them cards. I did not decorate the house, or buy candy hearts, or chocolates, or make decorations out of doilies or construction […]