So I’m teetering on the edge of a meltdown again.
I know because I am crying for no reason and for every reason.
Today at a swim meet, a friend of mine packed some individual packages of pistachios for her kids to have as a snack, and I looked at them and thought,
Wow. Imagine being able to buy those! When I have enough money, I will by those for my kids.
And then I started bawling.
So I do have some self awareness, which makes me feel good.
Because in the past I would have just kept trying to move forward until I completely came unglued.
So I’m still glued.
But I’m exhausted.
My husband’s unplanned surgery and some other unplanned crap happened.
It’s not my fault.
My problem is I’m having a little trouble asking for help because I feel like I’ve been leaning on other people for so long.
I feel like I should have my act totally together by now.
But I don’t.
We are still struggling.
It will come together.
I know it will.
But I was really beating myself up and losing hope yesterday.
And then I saw this on one of the vision boards that a member of one of my e-courses made:
So I regrouped, I let some people know that I was struggling, and I tried to refocus.
And then a member of one of my other e-courses wrote this to me:
When I had my ACL reconstruction friends organized a meal train. For 3 weeks we had meals delivered about 3-4 times a week. It was a godsend. You know who probably appreciated it the most…my husband. He works 60-70 hours a week. He was great after my surgery but he had to go to work. Sometimes the spouse needs just as much support as the recovering patient. You are really good about planning your food and meals but do you think a meal train would help? I am more than willing to bring food over. I know some of your friends. I am sure they would help with meals.
Screw the guilt and screw the shoulds.
Someone offered help, and I am taking it.
I learned today that there is a website called mealtrain.com.
An account has been set up for me, and people have signed up to deliver meals.
Yes, a godsend indeed.
So I don’t write this post looking for help.
I write this post urging those of you who are in a seriously shitty place right now to ask for help.
People want to help you.
People will help you.
All you have to do is ask.
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