A couple days ago this was the status on my facebook page :
Somehow a piece of bologna made its way onto the floor in the hallway. I decided I would see how long it would take for someone other than me to pick it up. At least 6 different people, including my husband, have walked past it multiple times. 6 hours later, it is still there… Any over/unders?
Well that piece of bologna hung in there for a good 18 hours until I finally caved, picked it up, and threw it away. If Number 7 hadn’t started crawling literally overnight, I would have left it, but she is putting anything she can get her hands on into her mouth. If she happens to find a random Cheerio, I have to admit that I just let her eat it, but a day-old piece of bologna crosses the line, even for me.
Plus, I don’t want that chick who made the fb page diaper comment to call DCF on me.
Anyway, yesterday afternoon Bolognagate still had me irritated. My husband came into the kitchen and got a head of lettuce out of the refrigerator.
“Can I have some of this lettuce?” he asked.
“Yeah. Can you just wash it off first?” I asked him.
“Do I have to wash the whole thing? Can I just wash this piece that I’m going to use?”
So many things went through my head, including…
Yeah, how silly of me to ask you to wash an entire head of lettuce. That would take forever.
“Didn’t you mean to say ‘Sure! How thoughtless of me! I’ll wash the whole thing and make both of us a salad!’ “
Instead, I just sighed and said, “Do whatever you want.”
“Because I don’t know how to wash the whole head,” he continued.
I just looked at him. “You can build an entire house from the ground up, but you can’t figure out how to wash a head of lettuce.”
“Well I’m not a lettuce officionado.”
All I could muster was “Oh my God.”
Which made him laugh.
Which in turn, pissed me off even more.
So then he tried to give me a hug.
“Don’t touch me.”
“I’m just trying to rub you,” he said, still chuckling .
“Oh you’re rubbing me. Rubbing me the wrong way. Don’t touch me.”
And that was the beautiful and loving exchange I had with my husband yesterday.