First story
I’m a little stressed out and extremely exhausted which led to my blond moment of the day (and year, so far) today.
I went to the gas station, filled up my tank with gas, returned a couple texts while I sat in my car as the tank was filling up, and then drove off.
It would have been good if I had removed the nozzle from my car before driving away.
I ripped that fucker right off of the gas pump.
Shit!
I backed the car up to the pump, took the nozzle out of my car, and hung it back up on the gas pump.
I was pissed.
Not because I had destroyed a gas pump, but because gas dripped all over my face and hair when I looked up to see how badly I had messed things up, and I had just taken a shower and put makeup on.
I’ll be honest.
The attendant inside was completely oblivious. I did think about just getting in my car and driving away before anybody noticed.
But I envisioned myself being broadcast as the gas pump vandal all over the 5:00 news.
Plus, I had just had a discussion with Number 3, 4, and 5 about karma.
So I went inside and told the attendant who then called the owner of the gas station.
I waited in my car, reeking of gas, and posted a picture on Facebook, wondering if car insurance covered this kind of thing.
The attendant came back outside and told me they would pay for the labor, but I’d have to pay to replace the part, and that I needed to give them $70.
I don’t know if that’s true or not. I imagine that gas stations have their own insurance to cover this kind of thing.
But I was just happy I wasn’t going to have to fork over a year’s salary to fix it.
I gladly wrote a check for seventy bucks and got the hell out of there.
If you are stressed out and exhausted and getting gas anytime soon, be sure to check your tank before you leave the gas station.
And if you forget to do that and pull a Susie, at least you know you are in good company.
Second story
Last week on Valentines Day, I surprised the kids and adopted a kitty from a shelter.
They have been begging for a cat for a long time.
Plus, we have a slight rodent issue in our house, so I figured I’d kill two birds (and hopefully all the mice) with one cat.
She is about two years old, and she already had the name Amanda when we got her.
None of us were in love with the name Amanda.
But we couldn’t come up with one we all liked or one that seemed to fit her personality…
Number 2 wanted Luna
Number 3 suggested Missy Franklin
Number 4 was pulling for Blackberry
Number 5 also liked Luna
Number 6 wanted to name her Lollipop
And Number 7 wanted to name her… Number 7
I thought of Black Beauty. Beauty for short, because she is a beauty.
But she didn’t seem like a Beauty or a Lollipop or a Missy Franklin or any of those other names.
So we have all just kind of been calling her different names for the last six days.
I figured we’d wait and see what her personality was like, and then the perfect name would make itself known.
The first couple days, she was pretty calm as she adjusted to her new surroundings.
But on about the third day, her personality started to come out.
She’s feisty and playful, but she loves a good, cozy spot to sleep.
And she really seems to love Number 3’s bed.
Tonight Number 3 was up in his room playing with the cat who was hanging out on his bed and he came running down into the kitchen.
“MOM! YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE CAT!!!” he told me, his eyes wide with excitement.
“What did she do?” I asked him.
“She was on my bed and a stink bug was flying around the light in the ceiling fan –
(because today it was almost 60° outside and whenever it gets warm the stink bugs make an appearance)
– and she saw the stink bug and she launched herself off the bed with her front paws out really wide and she clapped them together and she smashed the stink bug between her paws and she did it so hard that stink bug juice squirted onto my shirt! See the stain from it??? IT WAS SO AWESOME!!!!”
Number 2 and I looked at Number 3 and then at each other and Number 2 said, “She’s just like Mr. Miyagi.”
And so I would like to introduce you to our new cat,
Miyagi, the Karate Kitty.
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Our kitten’s name is “Ali”since he came in the house got on his back legs and started boxing with our very large dog (a GSP). So he is “Mohammed Ali” – our farm rescue cat.
Great call finding a name to fit the cat… It’s more fun
I love it! My 14-yr-old cat is named Luna, but it’s way too common now. Hopefully she will go all Miyagi on your rodent problem!
LOL!!! The petrol pump story funny. Once i had white pants on and was inexperienced with filling car myself, put the nozzle in, it kinda jammed so while still pressing it i pulled it out and poured petrol/gas(i live in ireland) all over myself in process. Had to walk into shop pay something like €2.23, odd number , the stink of petrol off me and not only that my pants was now see through on the crotch area! lovely, back in the car to drive 25 mins home on low petrol where my petrol soaked pants were now causing a serious burning sensation on my private area as i had just waxed that morning! I am sure there are lots of funny petrol pump stories out there. Sorry yours cost you though. Love from rainy Ireland x