Today Was A New Low

I had a few mom fails today.

First, this week is Read Across America Week I think. Or something like that.

We had a busy swim meet weekend, and Number 7 didn’t unzip her backpack until about five minutes before the bus was coming this morning, so whatever came home on Friday — okay, let’s be honest — more like whatever came home after last Monday or Tuesday never saw the light of day.

So when the bus pulled up and I saw a kid sitting in the window wearing a Cat In The Hat hat, I knew I had missed Dr. Seuss Day.

I felt bad for like one second because Number 6 and 7 don’t usually want to dress up for that stuff so it wasn’t a big deal.

But then as Number 7 was climbing up the stairs to the bus she said,

ARE YOU COMING TODAY AT ONE THIRTY?

And I was like, COMING WHERE???

And she was like

TO SCHOOL!!!

And then the bus drove off and her face was right up against the window as she vigorously nodded her head and mouthed the words come to school over and over again until I couldn’t see her anymore as the bus drove away.

So then I had to send the email of shame to her teacher and ask her what the heck I had clearly missed. and she told me there was a writing celebration at 1:30.

WHOOPS.

It wasn’t really a part of my plan for the day, but I was able to get there.

So I went for a run and did some work and then I took a shower and luckily I am working on a blog post about this awesome capsule wardrobe program I highly recommend, (especially if you waste time deciding what to wear every day) so I was going to be showered and I was taking pictures of some of the outfits I put together, so I’d be dressed in non-workoug/swim coach clothes which hasn’t happened much recently.

So this is what I looked like when I went to Number 7’s school.

I was feeling cuter than usual because I haven’t worn real clothes in a while.

Since this trip to school was not part of my day when I was making a plan this morning at 5 AM, I was rushing a little, and I was the last parent to get to the classroom and I was about 5 minutes late.

Parents sat in small groups with kids while they read the “books” they had written aloud, one at a time.

My phone rang about four minutes after I got there.

I fumbled to turn down the volume during this poor kid’s story.

Then I dropped my glasses on the floor about 30 seconds after that.

Then my phone rang — AGAIN — (I SWEAR I turned the volume down) so I quickly turned the phone completely off.

(It was Number 3 calling and he was feeling sick in the nurse’s office and he fell asleep for an hour and a half and then came home on the bus because I never returned his call because I forgot to turn my phone back on). Whoops again.

Anyway, Number 7 finished reading her story and it was cute.

She was the last one in her group to read, so then we kind of just hung around for a little while, and then Number 7 came over to me and she said,

“Jane (named changed) asked me if you were my Grandma.”

Here I was thinking I looked cute, and Number 7’s friends thought I looked like a fucking grandma.

“WELL YOU ARE 50,” she reminded me.

And that’s when I left school, came home, put my sweats back on, and called it a day.

BUT I DON’T CARE WHAT ANY 8-YEAR-OLD SAYS, I STILL LOOKED CUTE TODAY AND

NOT LIKE A GRANDMA.

How was your day? 🙄😜😂