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A little less than two years ago, I went on a cleaning tear. It all started when, annoyed by the mountain of clothing in my dining room, I decided I was going to reclaim my dining room table.
When I did that, Number 7, who was two years old at the time, immediately ran into the dining room, sat at the table and started belting out Happy Birthday at the top of her lungs. Because up until that point, the only time we ever sat at that table was when it was somebody’s birthday.
That led to an all-out cleaning binge. Well, it was more of an organizing binge.
I spent about three weeks going from room to room, purging stuff and getting everything in my house in order.
My house looked awesome.
For about a week.
I couldn’t maintain it. Mostly because even though I got rid of a bunch of stuff in my house, we still had way too many things.
And there is no place to put it all.
This past summer, I read the book Living the Simple Life. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed for a while now. I’ve known that we have too much stuff, but haven’t quite known how to go about getting rid of it. This gave me a starting point.
Then we went on vacation in August. Thinking back to past vacations, I decided this year that I was only going to pack the bare essentials.
The kids were told to bring a limited amount of clothing. And for the first time ever, I didn’t pack any toys.
So we were in North Carolina for two weeks with only the things we really needed.
That’s when I truly had an a-ha moment. It was so much easier to keep things neat on vacation because we had so much less shit to tidy up. We were surrounded just by simple and pretty things.
And then, I discovered my new favorite book, the life changing magic of tidying up. I didn’t have the actual book. But I had seen it floating around Facebook and other places. I had friends who were reading it. And whose lives had been changed by it.
So I borrowed it from a friend who had just finished reading it. And while I’m not done with it yet, so many of the book’s messages are things I have realized in the past couple weeks.
I have said recently that I need to get my house in order if I’m going to get my life in order.
And then I read this line in the book:
When you put your house in order, you put your affairs and your past in order, too. As a result, you can see quite clearly what you need in life and what you don’t, and what you should and shouldn’t do.
The biggest message in the book is that you need to get rid of stuff. And you should only keep the things in your life that “spark joy.”
I’ve been thinking about this a lot. And before I even heard about or picked up this book, I had already figured this out on my own.
Especially with Number 3, 4 and 5. They have received lots and lots and lots of hand me downs from people in the past couple years. And since our money situation is what it is, I find myself feeling afraid to get rid of anything or turn things away, because I never know if I might need them.
But what happened is we ended up with so many articles of clothing, there was no where to put it all. Their room was overflowing with clothes. Literally.
And my first thought was, “We need bigger and more efficiently designed closets.”
It’s true. The closets in their rooms are terrible and completely inefficient.
But we have also just been cramming way too much shit into them.
My kids had all these clothes, but they were only wearing a handful of outfits.
And so, one by one, we went through every article of their clothing. There were lots of things that I thought were super cute, but my kids never wore. And when it comes down to it, they may have sparked joy for me, but they didn’t spark joy for the kids. And that’s what really mattered for them.
We got rid of six garbage bags full of clothing that day. Six big, huge, bursting bags of clothes.
I helped the kids, but I let them pick the clothes to keep that they liked. Not the ones I liked.
And now, even with their tiny, inefficient closets, they have plenty of room for their clothes. And their room has stayed neat for over a week.
Which is a record.
They didn’t need bigger closets.
They needed less crap crammed into them.
Number 3 especially keeps commenting on how nice their room looks.
As Marie Kondo says, once you declutter and get red of those things that don’t spark joy, you are surrounded by only the things that you love.
Number 3 feels better because he is surrounded by the things that he loves. Like he physically feels better. He’s not misplacing his things as often. Or at all, really. It has actually changed his behavior.
Which brings me to this next line from my new favorite book:
When you’ve finished putting your house in order, your life will change dramatically.
I definitely need order in my house right now.
I didn’t really need to read that line. I had already gotten that memo. But just in case I hadn’t received the message loudly enough in the past couple weeks, tonight I went to Number 3’s 5th grade open house. And as I sat in his homeroom class, my eye was drawn to a big sign his teacher had hanging near her desk.
It had one word written on it in all capital letters:
SIMPLIFY.
Okay.
I get it. It’s time. Time to seriously simplify.
Tomorrow, I begin with my wardrobe, because that is one place I could use some major joy sparking. I actually have a fun plan for that. And I’m going to share it with you.
But you’ll have to wait until Friday to hear about that one.
Until then, I’ll be sparking some major joy in my closet. And if you struggle with the same problem that I do, maybe you can join me.
And we can all spark some joy together.
Pam says
I am reading that book as well and it is really thought provoking as to why we hold onto things. I “feel” so much better with an organized house – I clean in times of stress. I am also working on purging my clothes and getting down to a “capsule wardrobe” and it feels good. Pam in NH
Michelle says
I am reading Mari’s book too. I feel so much guilt to hold on to things. I feel like “OMG somebody worked so hard for their money and spent it on me, I should keep this” but then is gets stuck on a shelf or in a storage unit.
And I realized that the money is spent. I can’t unspend the $100 on that dress that was so “in” 3 years ago. But, I can learn to buy pieces that spark joy in lieu of things I am pressured into getting. 🙂
Kristine says
Good for you!! Be prepared for the unexpected! Not by keeping things you think you “might” use someday, but by the things you realize you don’t need once you start the process of aligning your space with your life. Its hard sometimes to let go of things that provide that illusion of security or contentment or the vision of what I wish my life was. But, that’s not reality, and its not helping me, or anyone else.
caroline murray says
YAY! So glad you are reading the book. It is not the same as any other book about getting organized and you hit the most important points. One thing I like is the idea of organizing by category not by room. And as sappy as it sounds, it has helped sometimes to talk to the item and say, “thank you for showing me that I look horrible in horizontal stripes” before tossing it. : )
adrienne says
I have Marie Kondo’s book but reading this has made me realize that I need to read it now so I can start the process of simplifying!! Thanks for this post!