Just in case you were feeling like you didn’t have your shit together, let me take this opportunity to make you feel not so alone.
Every year I have a hard time taking the Christmas tree down and putting the decorations away.
I just love my house when it’s decorated for the holidays, and I basically refuse to accept reality on December 26th.
Plus I just f$#@ing hate the process of packing it all up and putting it away.
First world problems, I know.
Inevitably, every year, my parents just can’t take it anymore, and sometime in January I get a text from them asking me if I want help putting away the decorations and taking down the tree.
Today was that day.
I played Christmas Chicken with my parents, and I WON.
They lasted until January 27th and then they just couldn’t take it anymore.
Clearly my parents are awesome.
In all honesty, I did have every intention of getting everything put away this year.
I had taken the ornaments off the tree.
I packed up the stockings.
But I stopped there.
The tree remained in the corner of the living room with the lights still on it.
Actually, I took one string of lights off starting at the top.
Rigor mortis had set in a couple weeks ago, and there it stood in the corner, with lights on the bottom two-thirds for about the last week.
My kitchen sink may have been sparkling clean on some or most nights, but my pathetic tree was still in the corner of my living room, and 95% of my decorations were still up.
Just a reminder that anyone who appears to have all their shit together NEVER has all their shit together.
So there’s my dad.
My tree had become a lethal, blood-drawing weapon, so he brought pruning clippers, a hand saw and a tarp and hacked that sucker up and hauled it out of the house like Tony Soprano disposing of a dead body.
I think I’m a halfway decent mom.
But I’m pretty sure I’ll never dismantle my kids’ petrified Christmas trees, even if they leave them in the house until July 4th.
Like I said…
My parents are pretty awesome.
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