You know when you have a baby, and you just can’t wait for him or her to do things?
Like you can’t wait for him to crawl?
But then you realize that crawling means your kids immediately become obsessed with the stairs?
Or you can’t wait for your kid to walk, but then you realize that once they walk, they can also climb, and then you have to put everything at least 5 feet off the ground?
For those of you in that non-talking limbo where your kid has yet to say “Mama” or “Dada,”
don’t rush it.
Enjoy it.
Because one day your two-year-old will get really mad at you.
And she will look at you, and with a bright red face and veins popping out of her neck, she will scream,
“YOU AW STUPID!
… AND I AM GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE VAGINA!“
And when that happens,
you,
and your vagina,
will reconsider all those times you were anxious for your kid to reach that next milestone.
2nd PLACE SUCKS! I need your votes!
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I’ll keep writing, you keep voting!
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Hahahaha..gotta love those fun times!
Ah…yes…the love children show you. My 3 1/2 year old told me the other night, “I am going to hit you,” and proceeded to slap me across the face. I need to start wearing a facemask.
Wow, I am so lucky that my 5-year-old hasn’t thought of punching me in the vagina yet! I just get random headbutts to the thigh!