There is a fable.
Or a parable.
Or an allegory.
It may not even be one of those.
It may just be a story of how shoes came to be invented.
I don’t know the title. I can’t find the actual story anywhere either.
But it goes something like this:
A king ventured out of his kingdom. While he was walking through the woods, he stepped on a thorn and hurt his foot. He was so angry that he ordered all the land outside the entire kingdom, the forest, the hills, the valleys, to be covered in carpet. Thousands of subjects set about to begin this ridiculous task. Until someone suggested, “Why not cover the bottom of your own feet with carpet instead?”
Yesterday I wrote a post about a school district that has banned just about everything under the sun during recess at its schools.
I think it’s bullshit.
Now I know why the school did it.
Because our society has turned into a bunch of people who think they are that king.
That king who believes the entire world revolves around him. Or her. Or their kid.
That king who, rather than looking inward, wants to blame the whole entire world for his problems.
School systems have turned into total pussies.
They are petrified of a lawsuit.
And rather than tell a crazy parent to go get themselves a pair of shoes, they are carpeting the whole entire kingdom.
At the expense of everyone else.
Rational parents and their children are being screwed over because of one or two douchebags.
So,
to you asshole parents who want to sue anyone and anything for any reason in an effort to blame others and avoid looking at the real problem,
which is YOU,
and your kid,
I say this.
YOU SUCK.
Your kids are going to get hurt.
It happens.
If you can’t handle the thought of your kid potentially getting a scrape on the playground, then TELL YOUR KID NOT TO GO ON THE MONKEY BARS.
But leave my kids out of it.
Don’t pussify the rest of our kids.
If your kid is rough and can’t play fair with the rest of the other kids,
then take care of your kid.
Tell him he’s not allowed to play tag at school.
Don’t ruin it for my kid.
Sometimes your kids don’t get to do what everyone else does.
That’s not called being unfair.
Or discriminatory.
It’s real life.
What are your kids going to do when they grow up to be adults?
Or should I say, “grow up?” And “adults?”
Because by trying to carpet the whole world outside the kingdom for your children, you are stopping them from growing up.
You are preventing them from learning how to deal with pain.
Disappointment.
Failure.
That shit doesn’t go away once you turn 18.
In fact, it only gets worse.
I’m running the NYC Marathon in November.
My husband would probably like to say he’s run a marathon too.
But his knees are seriously messed up.
He can’t run.
It’s not going to happen.
So maybe he should sue the whole entire New York City Marathon.
And the state of New York.
You know,
because it’s not fair that he can’t do it when everybody else can.
Or, instead, he can accept reality.
Move on.
Find something else to do that will bring him a sense of fulfillment and personal accomplishment.
Like a rational human being.
I don’t know.
Maybe we rational parents should take action.
How about if we rational parents cause an uproar?
How about if we rational parents file a lawsuit against the school system for not providing our children with adequate opportunities for physical activity?
How about if we rational parents sue the ridiculous, self-centered, asshole parents who believe the world revolves around them and their children?
Oh wait,
I forgot.
We rational parents?
We don’t do that shit.
We just get ourselves a pair of fucking shoes.
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“Life’s rough, wear a helmet”. At least that is what we tell our 3 year old. She prefers “Suck it up buttercup”, but I digress.
Thanks, I thought I might have been the only one that thinks we’re raising a bunch of self centred wimpy kids. (save for a few exceptions)
Just wanted you to know that things are really no different in Canada either. We live a few hours away from you in Ontario and I’m convinced when our daughter starts school next year we’re going to have to send her swathed in bubble wrap.
We’ve had a “please cut down the oak trees near my kids school”. Not making light of nut allergies, but really? Do you honestly believe that someone is going to throw a nut at your kid, or one is going to fall on their head?
The level of ridiculousness is out of control.
Thanks for giving me hope that there is still some rational thought out there.
My son broke his arm running into a wall during inside recess last winter. He has a mild form of autism so coordination is not his strong suit neither is group involvement so to me that meant yay at least he is getting involved and getting exercise. I mean the broken arm REALLY sucked but I never blamed the school for it getting broken ( for him sitting with it all day and not calling me I blame them but that’s another story). I had parent say I should complain about how hard the walls are in the gym and make them do something. I did not say what I was thinking (you idiots walls are always gonna be hard should I just bubble wrap my son instead?) I just ignored it. A month later I go into the school and the entire gym had brand new mats hung on all the walls. Turns out lots of parents complained after my son broke his arm (its a small town) so the school had taken money we had been raising for a new playground and bought the mats to cover all gym walls. So now instead of a new playground my son is protected from the walls. I hope no one decides to break rules and run in the halls and run into ant other walls or it could get really expensive.
We are in Canada too small town Saskatchewan
There are usually mats on most gym walls…for storage purposes and also if basketball is played there.
Thank you for this, Susie. I, too, am sick of the level of entitlement people in this society feel, for a job NOT well done, or not done at all. I have a 14 month old son, and my husband and I have already discussed how we absolutely will not allow him to grow up an entitled brat. Life’s hard…sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes you did a good job, sometimes you didn’t. The vast majority of the time, the responsibility for the outcome is on YOU. But people have gotten very good at deflecting responsibilty and blame. That’s not a lesson I want to teach my son.