A Fork in the Road

To catch you up to speed if you are new,

Two years ago, after gaining weight with each pregnancy, weighing 50 pounds more than I did when I got married, and knowing that I was totally done with having kids, I decided enough was enough, and I lost a bunch of weight.

I went from this:

To this:

I became a triathlete and a marathoner.

The exercise stuck.

But the eating habits didn’t.

And I gained about twenty pounds back.

Then, in November I was approached by Personal Trainer Food and asked if I’d like to try their program.

I decided I had nothing to lose.

Except those twenty pounds I had gained back.

In the beginning of December, my eating was a disaster. I was grazing all day long, finishing off all the food my kids had left on their plates, was drinking massive amounts of coffee with a decent amount of sugar in it, and was snacking in the middle of the night any time one of the kids happened to wake me up.

Which was pretty much every night.

I started the Personal Trainer Food program 3 weeks ago, 5 days before Christmas.

I had also gotten a running vest from a friend for Christmas, and I looked like a stuffed sausage in it.

I decided to use that as my measure of progress.

Here I am after Week One:

And here I am today, after Week 3:

The picture was taken by Number 5, my five-year-old, who was the only kid home this afternoon, so it’s a kind of blurry.

But I think you can see the difference.

The vest is still a little tight, but I’m getting there.

And today when Number 5 was taking the picture, she said, “Mommy! Take the tag off!”

I thought about it. I had been keeping that tag on in case I needed to return the vest since it was too tight.

But I had said by the end of the 4th week, I wanted to be able to wear that vest.

I needed to fully commit. So I ripped that mothereffer off.

Exchanging the vest is not an option.

So I’ve got one more week. I’ll do it.

Because the fit of the vest isn’t the only change.

I haven’t had sugar in 21 days.

21 days!

And you know what? I don’t really miss it.

For me, that is HUGE.

I haven’t had bread or pizza or cereal either.

Also huge.

I used to be one of those people who couldn’t fathom drinking coffee without sugar.

And now I can’t really fathom drinking it with sugar.

Instead of craving cookies and bread and any and all carbs that are totally useless to my body, now I crave protein. And vegetables.

That is a foreign, but welcomed feeling. I feel a lot better.

A lot better.

I saved a plate of Christmas cookies from my parents’ house and froze it.

I told myself I’d eat a couple as soon as my four weeks of Personal Trainer Food were done.

You know, as a reward.

But I don’t know.

I’m not sure I want them anymore.

And I think the reward to my body would really be to throw them in the garbage.

This isn’t to say that I’m never going to eat another piece of bread or a cookie or some ice cream for the rest of my life.

But to feel in control of myself and to not be obsessing over eating crap that makes me feel shitty, both mentally and physically, just feels good.

So I think I’m going to stay the course a little while longer.

I’m gonna stick to the road less traveled, cause the one I was traveling down before wasn’t really working for me.

…Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

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