I have been a mother now for ten years.
I have experienced 10 Mother’s Days.
That very first year as a mom I waited in anticipation for that amazing gift. For the perfect day where the world revolved around me.
I soon learned that Mother’s Day isn’t really all that different from every other day.
I stopped expecting gifts or anything out of the ordinary from my family about eight years ago.
I mean, that’s not why I became a mom anyway.
Sure, it would be nice to hear that I’m appreciated.
And there are some Mother’s Day gifts I’d like to receive this year.
But they aren’t gifts I can receive from someone else.
This year, the best Mother’s Day gifts I could ever receive are the ones I’m going to give myself.
1. I’m simplifying and getting organized.
There is too much shit in this house.
If something doesn’t have a place, it’s going.
And for every new thing that comes into the house, something old is going out.
I’m over the chaos.
And I want to teach my kids that things don’t make you happy.
Too many things actually do the opposite.
2. Acceptance
I have wrinkles. And stretch marks. And cellulite.
So does the rest of the world.
I will continue to lead a healthy lifestyle.
If that leads to a smaller muffin top, well that’s a bonus. But it’s not the end goal.
I’m not 21 anymore.
And if given the opportunity, I wouldn’t want to be.
I like the insides of my 45 year old body. It’s time I like the outsides.
I will look at old pictures to take a stroll down memory lane. But not because that is some ridiculous ideal I am striving to attain.
3. Laughter
I’m not bad at finding the humor in things.
But still, I don’t laugh as much as I would like to.
Laughing is fun, and I want to laugh more often.
4. Ending the war.
I engage in “getting to be right wars” fairly often.
There is no purpose to them, even if I am “right.”
They never end well.
So I’m withdrawing from battle.
It’s not going to be easy, but if I can manage to do it, I know lots of different areas of my life will improve.
And that would be a nice gift to give myself.
5. Less comparing and more celebrating.
I still allow myself to feel threatened by other women who possess talents that I don’t.
And I don’t complement them on their achievements or I beat myself up for feeling inadequate.
Why do I do that?
It’s not attractive, it’s not modeling the behavior I’d like to see more of in my kids, and it stops me from being the mom I want to be.
So yeah. I’m done with that.
If I can manage to give myself just one of these gifts, then this may be the best Mother’s Day of them all.
But if my family is reading and is still looking for ideas, a day by the pool with a 6-pack of Blue Moons wouldn’t be so bad either.
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rebecca says
I am giving myself something for mothers day as well…. i am quitting smoking…. giving myself better health.
Renee says
Good for you! Stick to it…you CAN do it! Giving up smoking is not easy but you will never regret it!