I am not a child psychologist.
Or a pediatrician.
I do not have a degree in child development.
But I do have a lot of hands-on experience with children.
When it comes to having babies, I’d say I’m a…
professional.
And so,
in my professional opinion,
I have some words to say with respect to potty training.
People have a lot to say about this topic.
The old timers will tell you you are doing it the wrong way.
That you should have done it earlier or this way or that way.
Then you feel like shit.
Because your kid won’t take a shit.
And then you may engage in a poop battle.
And get frustrated.
And angry with your child.
You might yell.
Threaten to lock him in the bathroom until he takes a dump in the toilet.
That doesn’t often work.
So, in my professional opinion, here is my advice.
Don’t force it.
With 5 potty trained and 2 in the process, here is what I know.
The more you push,
the less they push.
We have offered the same rewards and incentives for all the kids, and all of them have responded differently.
Some of them are motivated by these incentives.
And some of them could give a crap.
Or not.
The girls have taken to the potty earlier than the boys.
The boys have taken much longer to take a dump in the toilet.
Yes, it can be annoying when you are cleaning the 157th man-sized crap off of your three-year-old’s behind.
Yes, you will wait for the phone to ring when he is at preschool, his teacher letting you know that he pooped in his pants.
Yes, you will worry that when he walks onto the bus for kindergarten he will spend the day concentrating not on learning, but on holding in a shit the whole time he is at school.
And yes, you will wonder if you will still be wiping his ass when he enters 7th grade.
But one day, something will click, and it will happen.
So…
Be patient.
Offer encouragement.
Offer opportunities.
Offer incentives.
When they do have success, celebrate like crazy.
But don’t force them.
Your kids will be ready at different times.
And you won’t know what that thing is,
but at some point,
often when you least expect it,
something will click.
And being surprised may just be better than it happening on demand.
Don’t stress.
It will happen.
There is light,
and poop,
at the end of the tunnel.
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IreneC says
One of my twins is the same age as your little guy. She is the one who refused to pee or poop on the potty. Well, she pees on the potty, but pooping…no way. I can’t bribe her with ANYTHING…dance lessons, swim lessons, stickers, tattoos, Disneyworld, NOTHING. She finds a pullup and poops in it every time. She will not poop at daycare, so she has really tested the max capacity of that pullup at night. I just let it go. One day she will do it. She can dress herself, play Candy Crush and knows most of her letters. One day she will poop in the toilet.
Deanna says
Im having a heck of a time with my (nearly) 3.5 year old. She refuses to go on the toilet (for either poop or pee). We were doing pretty good for a minute and then she regressed. I asked her why and she said (drum roll please) “I don’t want to” (no amount of bribery will work on her)
My son? I told him I wasn’t buying any more diapers….that if he started using the toilet and not go in his pants I would take him to toys r us and buy him anything he wanted. He said ok….and that was the end of that. It cost me a whole $9.99 to get that child potty trained….he was 2.5