Next Stop, Richmond, Virginia

Number 3 and 4 first joined the swim team six years ago.

They swam on the town team which only swims in the summer and practices in the lake at the town beach. It’s a rinky dink little team, but it was the perfect introduction to swim team for them. They both loved it.

Of course, growing up a swimmer and swimming all the way through my senior year in college, I was  pretty psyched when they asked to join the swim team.

It’s hard not to live vicariously through them. Too much.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t doing that at all.

It’s also hard to balance their desire to do well and win and be the best with the knowledge that the burnout factor in swimming is very, very high.

There aren’t too many kids who are ranked among the top swimmers in the state as ten-year-olds who are still swimming when they are in high school.

So it’s a fine line.

Pull the trigger too soon and you risk them falling out of love with the sport before they really get to the good part. The part where they learn all the important life lessons that have both gotten me through some of the darkest times of my life and also given me the closest friends of my life.

Anyway, here they are after a meet that very first season.

Number 3 had just turned seven, and Number 4 was five years old (two months away from six).

They both exhibited natural talent and ability early on.

And now, six years later, here they are.

(Number 7 is the age now that Number 4 was six years ago when they first started swimming 🙂 )

Both Number 3 and 4 had great seasons this summer.  And they both qualified for a big meet in Richmond, Virginia this week called Eastern Zones Long Course Championships. It’s a four day meet where the top swimmers from states up and down the East Coast will be swimming.

They both set goals to make it to this meet this summer, and they both did it. I am so proud of them!!!

So, with the knowledge that they are swimming in some relatively elite circles at a fairly young age (which increases the pressure they may put on themselves), we are headed off to Richmond, Virginia tomorrow where I get to watch the two of them swim not as their coach, but simply as their mom (which I am very much looking forward to).

I drop Number 3 off with the other swimmers from CT who are 11 years old and older at 6:45 a.m. tomorrow morning (they all ride together on a coach bus and stay in a hotel together as a team) and then I’m making the 413 mile trip from Connecticut to Virginia with Number 4, 5, 6, and 7 (because the swimmers who are ten and under have to stay with their parents).

It’s gonna be interesting, no doubt, and if I survive the drive and the next six days with those four in a hotel room, I’ll be sure to keep you posted.

Wish me luck!


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Still searching for the gray.

I used to go see this therapist who was amazing.

She literally helped me turn my life around.

But she was a fucking disaster.

Her office was a mess, her car was a mess, and her appearance was also a mess.

I found it a little bit ironic that someone who was helping me to become more disciplined and in control of myself was completely out of control herself.

My husband and I also saw a therapist together a couple years ago.

And she was divorced.

I found that to be a little ironic as well.

I’m running two e-courses right now, and one is entitled Balance.

This week’s goal was to build at least 5 minutes into each day just to relax.

And I burned my candle so badly at both ends this week that I made myself physically ill from exhaustion.

I was at a swim meet yesterday afternoon, and halfway through it, my legs started to hurt so bad that I had to sit down for most of the second half of the meet.

Numbers 5, 6, and 7 were at my parents’ house, and by the time I got there to pick them up after the meet, I had to lie down on the floor.

Again, ironic.

Or maybe just stupid.

I’m telling other people how to avoid getting themselves into this situation, but not actually doing it myself.

I think I forget that I’m human sometimes.

I think I expect way too much of myself.

And so, today, I spent the whole entire day off my feet.

The whole day.

I didn’t do any work.

I literally watched 11 episodes of Scandal.

I have a ridiculous amount of work to do. And I planned on taking advantage of this snow day and getting as much done as I could.

Being productive.

But sometimes being productive doesn’t mean doing a lot of things.

Sometimes it means doing nothing.

A couple weeks ago I was at a yoga class, and it was the end of the class and we were all on our backs.

The instructor asked us to do one pose, and someone else in the class did a different pose.

And the instructor said, “Good idea. Let’s do that one.”

And the woman doing her own thing said,

My body called for it.

Those five words have been running through my head ever since that class.

My body called for it.

Today my body called for rest.

But I had issued myself a 30 days of yoga challenge! I couldn’t miss yoga!

Well, I’m not fulfulling the challenge.

It was hard for me to accept, but not the end of the world. I’m not a failure because I haven’t been able to do it.

Rest was more important today.

My body called for it.

I don’t know why I have such a hard time finding that middle ground.

Why I’m so good at the extremes. Why the black and white is so easy.

But tomorrow is a new day. I’m hitting the reset button and starting over.

And hopefully I’ll manage to land a little bit closer to the gray.

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Powering Down

I overdid it today.

I exercised too much, had too many things to do, didn’t take one break all day, didn’t eat or drink enough, just got home from coaching a swim meet, and I feel awful.

My former self would have written a post at all costs.

Because, well, because that’s what I do.

But one of my current e-courses is called “Balance.”

And if there is one thing I’m learning from yoga, it’s that I need to listen to my body.

So that’s what I’m going to do tonight.

Listen to my body.

It is begging me for rest.

Some days you need to power through.

Other days, you need to power down.

Today is one of those days.

The shit I didn’t check off today’s list can wait.

I’ll see you all tomorrow.

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Still working on that balance thing.

The past five days have been a little crazy.

I surprised my husband with a weekend away, which, in and of itself was a miracle.

So the couple days before that, running around trying to get stuff lined up was pretty much a blur.

I didn’t even get to write about that yet.

Then I was on the Dr. Oz Show.

I’m still waiting to get some pictures from that, so I haven’t written that post yet either.

And I was so nervous and excited for that whole thing that I only got about 2 hours of sleep that night.

The kids have also all been sick,

and today Number 7 was the last one to catch the cough from hell,

and I had no babysitter,

and I hadn’t really spent much time with any of the kids in the past five days,

and I had to coach swim practice tonight,

and Mo had an emergency so she’s not around,

and after discovering a few things about myself this weekend,

including the fact that I am overloading myself and that I have a hard time admitting that I’m piling too much on my plate,

I had to accept reality and acknowledge that I really only had time to fit one thing in today.

So I chose the healthiest option.


I was going to write a post tonight.

But I’m just out of gas.

So my post today is that there is no post today.

Gotta recharge the battery.

See you tomorrow.


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