Sometimes I get to the end of the day and I feel like all I’ve done is say no and don’t to the kids 5,000 times and tell them to stop doing stuff.
The no’s and the don’ts are tiring and not fun, for me or for the kids, and they aren’t especially effective. That’s why we have to say them a million times.
If you are feeling the same way, try this approach: instead of telling the kids what they can’t do, tell them what they can do.
Instead of saying, “No, you can’t have juice,” say, “You can have water or milk. You choose!”
Instead of saying, “DON’T RUN IN THE HOUSE!!!” say, “Walk, please!”
Instead of saying, “Don’t hit!” say, “Touch nicely.” (And then show how to touch nicely).
Instead of saying, “Don’t touch my phone,” say, “You can play a game on the computer.”
Instead of saying, “STOP FIGHTING,” say, “Outside,” or, “It’s compliment time!”
Put the emphasis and focus on the behaviors you’d like to see rather than the ones you don’t want to see.
The more you practice this, the more natural it will become and your interactions with your kids will be come less negative, and more positive.