Dear Mom With the Pain in the Ass Kid,
I’ve been watching you.
And I’ve been watching your kid.
I watch your kid when you walk into school.
I see your kid on the bus.
I’ve witnessed your kid’s (mis)behavior at Open House.
On the playground.
I’ve seen him pull his crap at practice.
In the grocery store.
At birthday parties.
On the field.
Wherever he is.
Wherever she is.
I’ve got news for you.
The reason why your kid is crying, repeatedly, isn’t because her teacher doesn’t “get” her.
It’s not because there is a lack of control in the classroom.
It’s not because he’s tired, or stressed, or experiencing a growth spurt.
It’s not because she’s sick or because she had a bad night or because she might be entering puberty.
It’s not because the coach is inexperienced or someone was picking on her or someone else did it first.
It’s not because your kid is a follower or because he was duped or because he doesn’t know any better.
Your kid knows exactly what she is doing.
Your kid is being a chronic pain in the ass because you are letting it happen.
Your kid is crying and throwing a fit and blaming everyone else because you are too.
Your kid is not misunderstood.
Your kid is being an asshole.
The good news is there is a solution.
It’s actually quite simple.
First, stop pointing fingers.
Then, if you really want your kid to stop being an asshole, the only thing you have to do is stop being one, too.
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